Getting Through the Holidays: A Mental Health Survival Guide
The holidays are supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year. So why do so many of us feel anxious, overwhelmed, or downright miserable when they roll around?
If you're dreading family gatherings, feeling stressed about gift-giving, or already exhausted from your packed social calendar, you're not alone. Let's talk about how to actually enjoy this season instead of just surviving it.
Why the Holidays Hit Different
Common holiday stressors include:
Financial pressure from gift-giving and travel expenses
Forced interactions with difficult family members
Disrupted routines and sleep schedules
Grief over lost loved ones that intensifies during family-centered Celebrations
Social comparison
Unrealistic expectations about what the holidays “should” look like
Setting Boundaries Without Setting Fires
You don't have to attend every event. You don't have to host just because you always have. You don't have to spend three hours listening to uncomfortable conversations.
Healthy boundaries sound like:
"We're doing a quiet celebration at home this year."
"We can visit for two hours, but we have other commitments."
"Our budget is tight, so we're doing small gifts this year."
Communicate your boundaries early and stick to them. Your mental health isn't negotiable.
Managing Family Dynamics
Before the gathering:
Lower your expectations Identify your triggers and plan responses Have an exit strategy ready
During the gathering:
Take breaks when you need them
Redirect uncomfortable conversations
Remember that you can't control other people's behavior
Money spent doesn't equal love shown. Consider gift exchanges with spending limits, homemade gifts, or experiences instead of expensive presents.
Dealing with Grief During the Holidays
The holidays can amplify grief over lost loved ones. There's no "right" way to grieve during this season. Whatever you're feeling is valid.
Create new traditions that acknowledge your loss, share favorite stories, or give yourself permission to skip events if you're not ready.
Protecting Your Routine
Holiday chaos disrupts the routines that keep us balanced.
Non-negotiable self-care:
Maintain your sleep schedule as much as possible
Keep some form of physical movement in your day
Limit alcohol (it's a depressant)
Eat regular meals, not just party snacks
Take alone time to recharge
When to Seek Help
Some holiday stress is normal. But reach out for professional support if you're experiencing:
Persistent sadness or hopelessness
Anxiety that interferes with daily functioning
Increased substance use to cope
Thoughts of self-harm
Severe insomnia or appetite changes
You don't have to white-knuckle it through the season.
Creating Holidays That Work for You
Here's permission you might need: you can create your own holiday traditions. You can skip events that drain you. You can say no to expectations that don't serve you.
Questions to ask yourself:
What do I actually want from this holiday season?
Which traditions bring me joy and which feel like obligations?
What boundaries do I need to set?
Your answers might surprise you. That's okay.
You've Got This
If you're struggling with holiday stress, anxiety, or depression, we're here to help. Our therapists at Long Island Behavioral Health can help you develop strategies to not just survive, but actually find some peace and joy in the holidays.
Ready to talk? Call us at 631-551-5095 opt 1 or visit https://longislandbehavioralhealth.com/appointment-request to schedule an appointment. We offer both in-person and telehealth sessions.
Because the best gift you can give yourself this season is taking care of your mental health.